Digital lizard brain. Consider all posts the emergent manifestation of dutiful procrastination.

mallelis:

KING HENRY: are you ever going to stop partying
HAL: im not partying
its IRONIC
KING HENRY: you’re partying right now
HAL: only as a commentary on partying
KING HENRY: that doesn’t make any sense
HAL: doesnt it

FALSTAFF: do u want to get high
HAL: yeah
but only because then everyone will be really impressed when i stop getting high
FALSTAFF: what
HAL: its a plan i came up with when i was high

Dirtbag Henry IV, Part I 

(via beforetherewasinternet)

“Cinderella never asked for a prince. She asked for a night off and a dress.”

Like not once did she say “I want a prince to come and rescue me from my situation.”

She just wanted to look cute and turn the fuck up at the party.

(via barbie-dolls-xx)

(Source: maxerica, via wokeupwithasmileonmyface)